Mastering getting your Goals?
You may ask yourself, “Why can’t I seem to achieve my goals?” I used to wonder this too, I want my goal and I try to get my goal…but I just can’t seem to achieve my goal! What the heck is up with that? I’ve worked so hard and I feel that I deserve to get what I’ve been working so hard to get. So, what is going on?
First off, it might be how you are wording your goal. “What does it matter how I word my goal. I stated what I wanted and I’m really trying to achieve it!” YES, that’s the problem. You WANT whatever you are going after. When you focus on wanting something, you accidentally usually get more wanting, not the thing you are going after. That’s why in goal setting I tell people to word it as if now.
That may make you think, “But when I say I have X right now, I feel like I’m lying to myself, I feel like a fraud.” I respect that, as I used to think the same thing. And yet if you think of the goal, and you think of it as if now…the way you think about the goal changes. If you take a goal that you achieved in the past and notice how you felt when you know that you achieved it, how did things look to you, what sounds did you hear, and really notice the feelings that you had. If you also attach this feeling of accomplishment to the goal that you are thinking of as having already happened, making it a nice and juicy goal.
Then what happens is that the only thing stopping you from getting that goal is, guess who? That’s right, YOU! Because the other part of the problem in your goal setting is that you are really ‘Trying’. Try is an interesting word, when someone invites you to go out and you don’t really know if you want to go you will answer “I’ll try to make it.” Or if your boss has a project that needs to get done and you tell them “I’ll try to get it done.” What does using the word TRY do for you?
I’m not saying that try is a bad word or that it doesn’t have times when it’s appropriate to use. However if you, somewhere in the deepest part of yourself, have learned to use the word try in such a way that it gives you an out…you may be sabotaging yourself. It’s not my intention to speak that over you, I know for myself in the past I used try in just such a way. Unfortunately, the word try started to get in my way when I wanted to improve myself and my life.
When you try something new, try is completely appropriate because you have never done it before. But what if you want to write a book, it’s really important to you and you even have a topic to start with. You have a good idea, what you want to write about, and you might even have an idea of how it looks and what it will make people feel and think. So, you make a plan to try and find some time to write.
Life is happening 100% of the time, so trying to find time to write is likely never going to happen. Wanting to write a book with this type of strategy is not likely ever going to pay off. Because if you want to write a book and you have to try and find time, the wanting will continue and time to write will remain elusive.
So, what do you do then? Step 1 is start to think about how you will feel when you accomplish this goal, as in our example the book is finally completed, whether you get published or self published it doesn’t matter, the book is completed. Step 2 plan your time, block out 30 minutes to an hour a few times a week to sit down and write, and put it on your calendar and follow through. Step 3 make sure that what you put in your calendar is manageable, if it’s not then you need to adjust until the time blocking is manageable.
Step 4 is to take action, in our case you sit down and start typing, writing, or audio recording to transcribe. Whatever it is you need to do to start the process of writing your book, take action. Step 5 take success steps every day, in our example you don’t have to write every day, just do something small every day that contributes to bringing to life your book. Step 6 complete the goal, if you start you need to finish. This completes the process for you, and it’s confirmation to the deepest part of yourself that you get what you go after.
If you don’t complete the goal, this is where I would point out to you “How you do one thing is how you do everything.” While this isn’t completely true across the board of your life in my opinion it is often times the truth overall. For example, if you keep your bedroom a mess and the rest of your house is clean…even though the rest of the house is clean your bedroom is the mirror to your inner self and it most likely resembles what’s going on in your mind.
So, I’m not telling you not to want something and not to try for it, but if you are going to want something then you need to take action. If the first thing you try doesn’t work then keep trying, take other action. Keep taking action until you succeed, because there is no failure (unless you quit) only information that informs you what doesn’t work for that goal. If you are going to want something, make sure to check inside yourself what it would feel like to have successfully achieved the goal. Because if you can’t get in touch with what it would feel like to have successfully achieved that goal then what is driving you to get the goal? Wanting it is driving you, what happens when you get it then?? You stop wanting it, you have it, there is nothing driving you anymore…except wanting the next goal or next thing for that matter.
Yes, want the goals and be fully informed in your body about what getting that goal will do for you. And yes, try for that goal by taking action and keep taking action until you have successfully accomplished that goal. Then it can be complete and if you make sure that the goal you have accomplished moves you towards your next goal then you can use the completion of all these goals to create massive momentum in your life.
This momentum leads you toward a life you may not have believed possible, but again you have to take action. Success steps, a little bit of taking action every day to keep you moving forward. It may not be fast in the moment but when you get to successfully achieving the bigger goals and then boom life gets amazing and you can’t believe it’s your life.
The 6 steps to goal getting success
1) Ask yourself, how will the successful completion of the goal feel? And really allow yourself to feel what it would feel like
2) Plan your time, block out time on your calendar to work on your goal.
3) Make sure that the time you have blocked out on the calendar is manageable. If you make a plan and it doesn’t work for you, you will likely feel defeated without giving yourself a chance to adjust.
4) Take action! Every successful goal in life requires taking action, you might get a vicarious thrill out of someone else’s success but it will never beat successfully completing your own goal.
5) Take success steps every day. There’s an old joke that is very apt here, “How do you eat an elephant?"…”One bite at a time.” It doesn’t matter if they are small steps or big steps, any steps towards your goals are important. Take the little wins and keep taking action.
6) Complete the goal. Take action until you have completed the goal, it doesn’t do you any good to stop halfway to your goal. That’s a lot of work to accomplish nothing in the end. Now the goal itself may shift in how it looks and feels, and that’s okay…If your goal is to buy a red BMW and you end up with a blue BMW that is equally as nice, I personally consider that getting the goal.
Now you know how to start mastering your goal setting. There may be some mindset blocks that might be stopping you from getting what you want. This is where I recommend getting some professional assistance involved. If you have problems of not feeling worthy of having the things you want, not being good enough, not smart enough, not strong enough, or any other belief that may be limiting your ability to get your goals it’s time to do what the professionals do…Hire a coach.
Personal and Professional Evolution Coaching is a way to take you from being stuck, not getting your goals, not making the money you want to make, and not having the freedom to do what really inspires you in life…to you moving forward, getting your goals, attracting wealth, and having more freedom in life than you ever thought possible. What would you do with a life where time and money are yours to do with as you please?
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